Military Spouses Make The Best Employees

Well, they do when they are employed, but what about when you don’t receive a salary? In this difficult job market, some of us cannot get a job in our field and sometimes in any other field. We are over-qualified or do not have a traditional work history. If we want to simply take any job to pay the bills, companies do not want to hire us because they think we are going to get bored and leave, I suppose. Add to this your status as a military spouse, and it gets even more difficult.

This was a huge problem when I lived in Virginia. I was fresh out of college, but I was in my early thirties when I graduated. Many employers said I was over-qualified and they felt I would be dissatisfied with the mundane tasks put before me if they hired me. What?! I wanted a job, a place to begin my career and money in my pocket. They did not get it. I hear others are in the same boat especially with the current economy making employers leery of hiring anyone new.

Here is a newsflash to all of the employers out there who do not want to hire competent, well-trained workers with a great work-ethic who have been working from home for years while moving to new duty stations every few years. You cannot get a better employee. We work hard because we have to. In order to continue getting new business if we own our own, we have to constantly be on the prowl for new clients. When we get a job in which someone else is paying us, we are grateful, so we show up on time, dress professionally and fulfill our responsibilities. We are highly creative for the most part. I am not talking about crafts - though many of us are into making things - I am talking about things like these:

• Creative packing. We have to pack rather quickly which all milspouses know is a serious challenge. You need to figure out what to keep and what to save for that final house after retirement.
• “The Box.” As we near our PCS date, we use up the food in our cupboards, and sometimes come up with the most interesting meals, don’t we? We have to get rid of food by figuring out what is good enough to pass on to another family, what we should toss, and what will be helpful during our first days in housing. Babette Maxwell of Military Spouse Magazine calls it a “Departing Box.”
• Necessary deception. If our children ask a question the answer to which will disturb them, or if we simply do not have a good enough answer yet, we sometimes have to do a tap dance. We come up with something that takes into account their level of maturity and degree to which they need to know, then come up with an appropriate story until it’s time for the truth. It is a way of letting them down easy in case we have bad news later on.
• Finally, as military spouses, we frequently have to single-handedly run the show at home while our active duty family member is away for whatever reason. This is the time I give serious credit to all of the single parents I know. It can be difficult doing everything, but we get really good at it … because we have to.

So next time you think twice about hiring someone who has been at home for a while or is a military spouse, don’t think, just hire. We are a great asset to any business.

Notes:

The 2009 Defense Authorization Act is now law, and includes a 3.9 percent across-the-board raise in military basic pay, effective on January 1, 2009. That means military members will see the raise in their January 15 paychecks.

http://usmilitary.about.com/od/fy2009paycharts/a/bpayenlless.htm

Find Your Way Home - AT NINE?

This comes from the "Just When I Thought I Had Seen It All" file. It is sure to promote a discussion, one way or the other.

Lenore Skenazy is a contributing editor at the New York Sun and founder or FreeRangeKids.com. I don't want to give her any press, but this was completely outrageous, IMHO.

Lenore left her 9-year-old son in Bloomie's in New York a few weeks ago. She did this on purpose so he could find his own way home. She says this fosters independence. She says she did not fear her son would be abducted. She feels happy with herself that she gave him a subway map, a transit pass, $20 plus several quarters in case he needed to make a call (on the public telephones that hardly exist anymore due to the existence of the cell phone she did NOT give him).

OK. I know they live in New York City, and City kids are a bit more worldly and cosmopolitan, but what in the name of God was she thinking?! The child is NINE! He is a CHILD! I think of how little my very-tall-for-his-age son looks and shudder to think of what could have happened to her son.

Skenazy's reasoning was basically that "overprotectiveness is a danger in and of itself. A child who thinks he can't do anything on his own eventually can't." Uh, yeah, but shouldn't the kid be a little older before he braves the wilds of the world without someone watching over him a little bit?

Is it me or did I completely miss something this time?

You can read the story for yourself here:
http://www.nhregister.com/WebApp/appmanager/JRC/BigDaily?_nfpb=true&_pageLabel=pg_article&r21.content=%2FMAIN_REP%2FArticle%2F2008%2F04%2F18%2F1919570

Do you underestimate yourself?

I went for a job interview the other day and finally felt good about my performance! Even though I am the consummate professional at these occasional interviews, there is always that insecure feeling deep down inside. I wonder if I look professional enough or if my “mommy-ness” is evident. I mean I am a gal who works from home all day. I really do wear sweats and frequently hide my unmade-up face behind sunglasses when I pick up the kids from school. When it comes time to get gussied up for a professional meeting, even if it is just networking with other freelancers, I find myself feeling a bit inadequate.

Then there is the actual part of the meeting during which I have to answer questions with intelligent, well-thought answers. Did I sound intelligent? Did my answer sound as if I thought about this interview or the position enough? When you “speak” via the keyboard all day, and speak to children the rest of the time, it can sometimes make you sound like a blithering idiot. This does not even begin to consider my laid back, casual attitude hard won by the trials and tribulations that have occurred in my life. Do not get me wrong. Life is good, but it has not always been this way for me.

Therefore, the other day, all of this walked into the interview with me, but I finally accepted it. I accepted who I am and realized the considerable skill and insight I would bring to this particular job. All of my experiences have converged to put me in the right place at the perfect time for me.

What I want to know is this: has this ever happened to you? Did you have a moment when you realized who you are and celebrated that person and all of her talents as well as the flaws?

In the meantime, do not underestimate yourself, whether you have “off-ramped” to raise your children or to support your husband’s career, or whether you are gunning for a better job. You have to believe in yourself or no one else will. I do! Even if I do not get this job, I know I nailed that interview.

‘Ever Get Stranded In A Blizzard?

I did! The Blizzard of ’78 has turned into somewhat of an urban myth at my high school. You see I went to Sacred Heart Academy, a small all-girls Catholic high school in Hamden, CT. That day, Vicky, Elisa and I schlepped down the hill in our uniform skirts, our arms piled high with textbooks, the icy wind whipping past us, determined to get on the city bus that would take us home. We never made it. Instead, we were stuck with several other people at the diner located on the same corner as the bus stop. No one went anywhere all day including the busses.

While stranded, we helped a man who spoke only Spanish, called Vicky’s brother in vain since he was the one who had four-wheel-drive, and kept in constant contact with the convent up the hill.

After about four hours, Mr. Cusano, the school’s handyman and owner of a snowplow, made it down the hill to pick us up. We were devastated! We were going back to school to wait out the blizzard! Little did we know that many of our classmates were stuck in less comfortable places such as shelters and public buildings. Everyone was stranded included the poor man at the diner who spoke only Spanish.

In actuality, we were lucky. The sisters set up camp for us in the school library, wheeled in a television, and cooked us some great meals! Those apple dumplings were to die for! The three our families knew each other, too, so we did not mind who picked us up or to which house we went. We were all voracious readers and found ourselves stuck in a library of all places. We read, laughed a lot, and ate like little piggies. The only part we did not like was when the nuns made us clean the cafeteria in payment for their hospitality. I am sure we did not do as great a job as they would have, but we made a half-hearted attempt to please our captors. This is how we thought of them, but they were very nice hosts.

After two days, Vicky’s brother finally made it to the school and rescued us. He even drove Elisa and me all the way home. When we arrived at my house, I was overjoyed. The piles of snow were still high enough to play in and would remain so during our weeklong unexpected vacation.

In later years, my mother would meet a graduate of Sacred Heart while working at the phone company. The woman gasped when she discovered that the three girls really existed.

“We thought that was just a myth!” she exclaimed.

It is no myth, Girlfriend. I am here thirty-five years later still thinking about those dumplings.

Happy Anniversary Vicky and Elisa!