Direct link: http://web.safecrm.com/ZNJGBT3GL6PMQ2KT@0C0B14D3OCDUH5.htm

Letters of Hope Team

FROM CAROLYN BARNETT OF MILITARY SPACE:

I would like to encourage you all to become members of our Letters of Hope Team. All you have to do is commit to writing one letter each week to one of our deployed soldiers, 

You must be a member of the Message Boards located at http://www.military-space.org/forum/index.php?referrerid=13.  Once you have registered with the message boards you must take the following steps:

All you have to do is click here: http://www.military-space.org/forum/...editusergroups and join the team you want to join.

Then, you will need to go to: http://www.military-space.org/forum/...?do=form&fid=1   fill out the required information for the  team leader to contact you. At that point,  the  Team leader will email, or private message you letting you know the status of your Team application, and remember:

1. I am an American. I know that the men and women in our Armed Forces are prepared to give their lives to defend my country, my way of life and the blessings of liberty throughout the world. I am committed to their perpetual recognition, appreciation an
2. IAs they have sworn to defend me and protect our country, so will I pledge to support them in every way that I can, and to avoid any action that would increase their risk. I will further do my part to ensure that they are never sent into harm’s way
3. For our military veterans, I pledge unfailing recognition and appreciation for their contributions to our national defense and our welfare. I will not forget my nation’s responsibility to provide for their continued well-being, and meaningful compensation
4. I will never forget that our service men and women are fighting for my freedom and are dedicated to the principles which make our country free. I will share the responsibility for preserving that freedom with those who proudly wear the uniform of the United States Soldier/Sailor/Airman/Marine.

If you have any questions please email Carolyn@military-space.org .

DoD 9/11 Special Pay deadline looming

Service members, veterans, and beneficiaries of servicemembers whose service was involuntarily extended under Stop Loss between Sept. 11, 2001 and Sept. 30, 2009 are eligible for RSLSP.  

Visit this link for more information and to apply: http://www.defense.gov/home/features/2010/0710_stoploss/

DEADLINE October 21, 2010.

Please share with everyone you know who may be eligible.

Disney discount discovered!

The Swan and Dolphin gave me an EXCELLENT military discounted rate! $159 for a resort view (parking lot) and $184 for a preferred view (the parks and surrounding area). The funny thing is that when I called ITT to clarify a discrepancy in dates for the park ticket promo, she said she had never heard of the hotel discount at the Swan and Dolphin. As she was researching something for me, she called the Disney agent and THEY had not heard of it. I found out about it at Mousesavers and then got it when I called the Swan and Dolphin. Seeking to maximize our savings on dining (they don't accept the Dining Plan at the S&D), I called again to ask about their military discounts on dining at their hotels. They offer a whopping 50% on all food and beverages (excluding alcohol) with the exception of the Signature Restaurants (Shula's, etc.).

All I'm saying is for the love of mike, ASK! Ask for discounts and don't be ashamed to do it. Our spouses, or we, serve and should take advantage of any military discount provided.

Cpl. Xhacob Latorre from Waterbury Passes

Standing By

Alison Buckholtz is posting this week in conjunction with the publication of her new book, "Standing By: The Making of an American Military Family In A Time of War." This book is a must-read for those of us who can relate as well as those who are curious about the life of a military family.

Thank you, Alison!

Military spouses are usually seen but not heard. I think this is because keeping quiet about the challenges of a military lifestyle is sometimes equated with loyalty. So military spouses are sometimes stereotyped as being quiet, reticent, blindly loyal, not so bright, or not terribly ambitious. I believed that stereotype myself, but when I started getting to know other military spouses I realized quickly how wrong I had been. So part of my goal for Standing By: The Making of an American Military Family in a Time of War, was to rewrite the image of the military spouse in the public imagination.

The experiences I write about emerge from my years as a military spouse. But the subjects, like love and loneliness, grief and loss, are eternal human themes which affect everyone. Standing By is the story of our family as we grew to know each other in new and surprising ways, and more than anything else, it's about how these relationships transformed us.

Many of the servicemember spouses I have met since embarking on this unexpected path have traveled it much longer than I have, and their experiences are richer and more dramatic than my own. Learning of the far-flung places they have established their lives, and the hardships and losses they have endured, has humbled me. Their can-do attitude and adventurous spirit has inspired me. They have taught me valuable lessons about the challenges and rewards of a military lifestyle, and I feel honored to transmit what I have learned from them -- especially if I can bring these stories to a civilian population with a limited understanding of America's Armed Forces. In doing so, I hope to show non-military readers the human face of deployment as it was experienced by those left behind. If military spouses read my memoir and think, "That's nothing, I've had it much harder," I hope that they will be inspired to share their experiences.

I call my military experience an ongoing civics lesson, and I've learned more about the nation – and the important role the military plays in its ongoing stability -- than I ever learned in school. Although in Standing By I portray my struggle with our identity as a military family, I believe the book is ultimately a tribute to the military, because our experience made me appreciate what it means to be an American.

Alison Buckholtz
http://www.alisonbuckholtz.com/

Share Your Good Wishes With Our Troops This Holiday

Someone sent me the email that goes around every year about sending cards to recovering soldiers. I had heard that Walter Reed could not accept cards or packages in the past, so this year I decided to investigate a bit. The following is what I found posted on the American Red Cross Website. Follow the simple guidelines and you can cheer a few service members during their holidays at the hospital.

From the American Red Cross website:

Holiday Mail for Heroes

From the front lines to the home front, the American Red Cross provides service members, their families and veterans with the care and assistance they need.

The Red Cross is partnering with Pitney Bowes this holiday season for the Holiday Mail for Heroes campaign. For the second year in a row, we’re collecting holiday cards to distribute to American service members, veterans and their families in the United States and around the world. Pitney Bowes is generously donating technology, resources and postage to make this holiday card program possible.

Our goal is to collect and distribute one million holiday cards to spread holiday cheer and facilitate thanks to these brave individuals and families.

Please send cards to this address, following the guidelines listed below:

Holiday Mail for Heroes
PO Box 5456
Capitol Heights, MD 20791-5456

You can also:

• Download and print a free card.
• Learn about other ways to participate.
• Get the latest news about Holiday Mail for Heroes.
• Watch a video from Red Cross Celebrity Cabinet Members, Dr. Phil and Nancy O'Dell.

Card Guidelines

Please follow these guidelines when mailing a card to ensure that your card will quickly reach service members, veterans and their families. Every card received will first be screened for hazardous materials by Pitney Bowes and then reviewed by Red Cross volunteers working in one of 16 sorting stations around the country.

• All cards must be postmarked no later than Wednesday, December 10, 2008. Cards sent after this date will be returned to sender.
• Participants are encouraged to limit the number of cards they submit to 25 from any one person or 50 from any one class or group. If you are mailing a larger quantity, please bundle the cards and place them in large mailing envelopes. Each card does not need its own envelope or postage.
• Please ensure that all cards are signed.
• Please use generic salutations such as “Dear Service Member.” Cards addressed to specific individuals can not be delivered through this program.
• Please send cards as opposed to long letters which delay a quick review process.
• Please do not include email or home addresses on the cards, as the program is not meant to foster pen pal relationships.
• Please do not include inserts of any kind, including photos, as these items will be removed during the reviewing process.
• All cards received may be used in program publicity efforts, including appearing in broadcast, print or online mediums.

Where to Send Phone Cards, Gift Cards and Care Packages:

Phone cards or gift cards will not be accepted with the holiday cards. Those wishing to send calling cards or gift cards/certificates should go to http://www.aafes.com/, scroll down to "AAFES Community Connection" and click on "Help Our Troops Call Home" or "Gift Cards/Certificates for Our Troops" in order to send such items.

No 'Care Packages' will be accepted at this address. Those wishing to send care packages should go to http://www.americasupportsyou.com/ and click under "Homefront Groups" to find out how to send care packages.

Does anyone else feel like a fraud?

I feel like a fraud sometimes. When I am at a reading of my book or teaching a writing class for Adult Education, I wonder when someone will reveal me. It is inevitable, isn’t it? You work very hard to be good at whatever you are good at, then doubt yourself even though you have no basis for that doubt. It’s human nature, apparently.

As a military spouse, I have not had to deal with a lengthy deployment (knock on wood lest it happen now that I jinxed it!), and I have not moved around too much (only five times in 12 years). Yes, there have been many TAD’s and duties, but a week here or there, or one night alone in bed is nothing compared to what other spouses deal with on a regular basis. In short, I’ve been blessed.

The problem is that sometimes I feel like a fraud and not a real military spouse. Then I remember we are all on standby. As a milspouse, we are all waiting for that call every time we hear something on the news. We are all aware of that special set of uniforms tucked away at the back of the closet. We are all aware that we may have only 72 hours to get things in order and prepare the kids, and that 72 hours is if we are lucky. Many have less time than that before their husband or wife leaves for a while.

The point is not to feel like a fraud or dredge up any guilty feelings if you have been blessed as I have. Go with it. Revel in it. Just make sure to help out someone else who has not been so blessed. We need to take care of each other because we are all supporting our country by supporting our active duty member. Be proud, stand tall and thank you for your service.

NEWS OF NOTE:

Click and Connect: Find a Battle Buddy

May 13, 2008 Andi - SpouseBUZZ is all about connecting with one another and sharing our collective "married to the military" experiences. We've updated the long list of milspouse bloggers that we've managed to gather from previous posts. Plus, additional links that you've sent our way have been added. You may find that there are some spouse blogs you can relate to more than others, so browse the links and try to find a battle buddy (or twenty). Sit back, click and connect.

I'm one of them! - Rosemary

Spouse Career Advancement Initiative Extended
by Barbara A. Goodno, Special to American Forces Press Service

WASHINGTON, May 15, 2008 – Career and training opportunities for military spouses just got better, as the Defense and Labor departments’ career advancement demonstration project has been expanded to include all active-duty military spouses, along with four additional career fields.

Free lift ticket at Attitash

I wanted to get this out sooner rather than later for all of you snow maniacs. We are hardly getting any snow up here in Connecticut, so enjoy it while you can!
-----------------

On March 8, 2008 all active duty, National Guard and Reserve Soldiers, and
retired military personnel as well as any U.S. military Veterans can receive
a free lift ticket to be used on that day when they present a valid military
I.D. or DD form 214 at the ticket window.

On that day guests can receive $10 off the price of their lift ticket and an
American flag lapel pin when they bring any three items (from a qualifying
list**) that will be sent to the soldiers currently stationed in Iraq and
Afghanistan. Season Passholders are also invited to bring items.

**visit http://www.asoldierswishlist.org/wishlist.php

Guests will also be encouraged to participate in a flag parade that will
begin at the summit of the mountain and traverse Northwest Passage trail
finishing in the main base area where the National Anthem will sound out.

For more information, check out their website at Attitash promotion.

Military Spouses Face Unique Challenges

I live in an area that is about an hour from base. Needless to say, people here are not familiar with the military subculture and do not know much about our unique challenges and advantages. Many of my experiences have been good, but there are many things we deal with every day that are completely foreign to those not part of the military community.

For instance, there is the job arena. Since marrying my sailor, I set myself up as a freelancer because I knew my life would not be lived in one place. Yes, I tried to get a job, but everywhere I applied, I was over-qualified (employer-ese for “You’re not going to be around here too long, so why hire you?”) It is illegal to say that, but we have all been through it. Unless you work in a job that is of a temporary nature, or are in a health profession which is starving for people in some places, you have a hard time finding a job that is worth your energy.

So many people are doing what I did and taking their work home. This is where the sub-culture comes in. We LOVE home parties. As a result, you can’t swing a cat and not find someone who owns one of those cottage industries that sells kitchen or scrapbooking products. But how does this fly with the civilians? It does not. If you are having a makeup party, they don’t want to come because they don’t “need anything right now,” or they just buy a lipstick. If you have a kitchen party, they don’t come because they “have enough Tupperware.” They do not understand that to the military spouse, a home party is not simply a demonstration, and you will not be pressured to purchase the products shown. It is a way to socialize when Hubby is deployed. It is a way to get in touch with your girlfriends and get out for a night without the kids, though sometimes the kids are in tow, and that’s fine, too. I have not been to a home party where the host has not made some provision for the children. It always happens. The demonstrator does not always expect many purchases because she is usually a military spouse, too. It is a way for her to get out of the house, too.

We are different as military spouses. The workforce is only one of the many areas in which we face challenges and different triumphs than the rest of the population. We need to educate the public a bit if we live far from our military spouse buddies. Then again, why not have a party?

What challenges do you think we face that are different than the civilian world? Yes, some are obvious, but what makes our experience unique?

I am off to SpouseBUZZ this weekend to share experiences with my fellow military spouses. If any of my readers are there, please jump out of the crowd and introduce yourself. You may be featured in an article or two. I am always looking for people to interview for the many magazines and websites for which I write. Maybe you will be one of my features!

As always, to the military spouses out there, thank you for your service.
Rosemary

My Business Has A Name

Thank you to everyone who participated in helping me name my business. Unfortunately, the person who came up with the perfect name already has one of my books. In fact, it’s dedicated to him! My husband, Alan, came up with the name when I asked him if he was thinking about it. When he told me he could not read my blog because it was blocked at work, I filled him in. He said, “How about A Word Or Two,” and I jumped. I loved it and thought it was the perfect name for a writing business.

So, that is the new name: A Word Or Two. I will get to work on my collateral materials, send out a press release, and what I have been doing for years will no longer be a sole proprietorship, but an LLC.

While waiting for my tax number, I had to start scheduling next semester’s round of adult education classes. I teach The Business of Freelance Writing, and Write Your Novel. The first is about the mechanics of making a living as a freelance writer such as the things you need to have in place, the way to get jobs, etc. The Novel class is the way I personally organize things when I write a novel. I am very good at researching using the internet and many other writing-related skills.

What other courses might be of interest to my students?

If you have any ideas, I would love to hear them. It is always rewarding meeting new writers and helping them along their journey to publication. I would love to know if there is anything I am missing.

While I wait for your wisdom, here are a few tidbits for you.

When you are making out your Holiday card list this year, please include the following:

Cards for our American service members. (Remember, they are not all soldiers, but other service members as well.)

A Recovering American Armed Service Member
c/o Walter Reed Army Medical Center
6900 Georgia Avenue,NW
Washington,D.C. 20307-5001

Aqua Dot Recallhttp://www.canada.com/theprovince/news/story.html?id=4f76018a-9856-485c-962f-8ffb2bd67ca4

It seems the little "dots" can turn into a deadly substance if kids put them in their mouths. Mine will remain hidden until they figure this one out.

National Novel Writers Month
http://www.nanowrimo.org/

I signed up, but have no written a word of my book yet. It is SO not going to happen, but I thought I would let readers know about it. Perhaps you can consider it for next year.

Have a happy and productive week!

Deployment and Lemonaid

NATIONAL MAMMOGRAPHY DAY!

Find your local center and check "the girls." It may save your life.

Click here.

Right now, I am writing a couple of articles for Military Spouse Magazine http://www.milspousemag.com/. Once again, I am struck by the courage of women – military wives in particular.

This piece is about ringing in the new year without your spouse, a common occurrence in the days of war. They say that when given lemons, you should make lemonaid. Well, that is what these spouses have done. As I read the responses to my e-mails, and hear the stories over the telephone, I cannot help but burst with pride. No, I do not think it is a good thing to be away from your spouse for an extended period of time, especially while he is in a war zone. I do however believe we have to step up to the plate and do what’s required when things do not go our way, and that is what all of these women have done.

They have decided to make lemonaid. Some return home with their parents or other relatives for the duration of the deployment, while others simply jump in and act as Mom AND Dad for their children. Others spread the love and reach out to others in the military community who might need help coping.

As I said, I am bursting with pride because I, too, am a part of this community of strong women – the military spouse. I have only spoken to wives, but I know there are husbands out there doing the same things, with and without children, while their wives are deployed. I tip my hat to all of the spouses, whether or not they are facing deployment of their other half. We all share a bond and we should all be proud of ourselves and each other.

What do you do differently when your spouse is deployed or TAD?

Chime in and let us know the type of lemonaid you make when you are handed those lemons.

P.S. Military Spouse Magazine goes monthly in January 2008, and hits the commissaries later in the spring. Check out this publication specifically geared to the military spouse. Tell 'em Rosemary O'Brien sent you.

Marrying The Family

I am on the hunt for blended military families. I want to know how they did it, what challenges they faced which were specific to military families, and any tips they may have for those trying to blend families with children while serving in the military. Do you know anyone? Send me their name and e-mail, but make sure to check with them first, and they may be featured in an article I am working on for a military-friendly publication. They can also be quoted anonymously if they prefer. It’s up to them. I just need to honest, direct information from those who have been through this challenging situation.

Blending a family has to be difficult enough, but when combined with a military lifestyle, I cannot imagine it. With the frequent moves, deployments, and general demands of being part of a military family, children have a lot to deal with it. Add to it that mom or dad is marrying a member of the military, and all bets are off.

So if you can help, please contact me. I would like to produce an honest, informative article that may also help others. While you're looking for that e-mail address, check out 4 Military Families. It's a great site dedicated to informing the military spouse.

To all of our service members, military spouses, families, and veterans: thank you for your service to our country.